Wisdom is free to those who ask

Well y’all, I did it. I left my Miss Know-It-All in the hands of total strangers and drove away. As you’re reading this she has officially been on duty as an intern for the Buffalo Dream Center for one week. And I’m terrified she’s never going to want to come home.

You see, Chad and I both know that our children are not really OUR children. We know that God has given us these four precious humans to raise, guide, steward and eventually come alongside as they develop into their purpose for His Kingdom. It’s a tough pill to swallow, especially for a helicopter mama like myself, but the reality is, she was made for this.

She’s known for two years that she was called to full-time ministry, and cannot envision her life any other way. It’s kind of funny to me that this is the child I had at one point hoped would be headed for the Ivy League. But God had very different plans for her.

On another note, Chad and I celebrated 16 years of marriage last Friday. Some days it seems like we’ve been together for twice that, and other times I feel like it was just yesterday that we said “I do.” We are very much looking forward to the next 16 and what they have in store. We’ve decided that our twentieth will be spent somewhere tropical with blue water and white powdery sand, as opposed to the Weston pool. But we got to spend the entire day with all four kiddos without any other distractions and priorities. All in all, I call it a win.

It’s funny because neither one of us ever really thought about the various aspects of making a marriage work or being a team before our “Love After Marriage” conference last year. We just both did life as we always had and they kind of melded together because of kids and church.

But now, we view marriage as this beautifully designed union that requires the very best of each half to make one spectacular whole unit.

We certainly never had a heart for marriage, or viewed it as a potential area of ministry we’d like to focus on some day, but I can say with certainty that this has now changed, and we look forward to that season somewhere in the future. Our understanding of the Biblical definition of marriage has grown leaps and bounds, and I no longer shudder at the words “submissive wife.” When you have a true understanding of what those words mean, it’s no longer offensive and you no longer feel like you need to be the president of the “I Am A Strong, Independent Woman” club. In fact, I wear very different lenses when it comes to being not only a wife, but a mother as well. These people God has entrusted me with are so precious. And it is a great privilege and an honor to be his wife and their mama. I think I took both roles for granted before, not really understanding the impact I have on any of their lives, not grasping the magnitude of the job set before me.

If you’re married, or have children, regardless of how old they might be, I encourage you to pray, and ask God, “How you can I be better?” Ask God to show you their needs, to reveal to you the areas that they really require your guidance; because sometimes, we truly just miss it without the divine wisdom and revelation from the Father. He loves us. He wants us to be the version of ourselves He designed, but sometimes, most of the time, we get in the way of that. But that’s the great thing about God, He’s never far away, and can always guide us back to where we need to be.

In the book of James it says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” Take Him up on it. You won’t be sorry.