Being a caregiver is a tough job. Being “on” 24/7 makes for a very long day. When you are the caregiver for someone with Alzheimer’s disease, your day seems like an endless cycle of answering questions, usually the same question over and over again, all while trying to keep your loved one safe.

Daily confusion reveals your loved one cannot stay alone any longer because they have lost touch with reality. People who suffer from memory loss still think they are very successful at this thing called Life, but it is evident that they are not. So that takes me back to the caregiver having to be ready for anything 24/7.

My best advice for caregivers: You must have breaks and TAKE breaks when offered. The definition of respite is a short period of rest or relief from something difficult. The main caregiver for someone with Alzheimer’s disease feels obligated to spend every waking moment in the action, as “they know the person best.” Most spouses and children do not want to burden other family members or friends, but this is exactly what you need to do.

When asking others to help, they have a feeling of success that you trust them to look after their loved one. Good people love to help. Seek out good people in your life, and ask away! You will be surprised how many friends/family want to help. Other avenues: look into home health, your local senior center, your church family, or other recommended people to help with the endless job of caregiving.

Respite time is crucial to reenergizing caregivers. Also, if you are not a caregiver, but know one, reach out and help. Make food, offer services, offer your time. Reaching out first to a caregiver is a game changer and they may say no at first, but keep trying. Once they see the possibilities, they will usually continue to ask for help or accept your offer.

Another difficult piece of caregiving is losing yourself in the care process. Are you still golfing when able? Having dinner with friends? Going on vacation with family? Most caregivers do not see this as important but it is essential to your physical and mental wellbeing. Make a list of things you love to do and get out to do those things at least two days per week.

There are also options for daily or weekly respite found in Memory Care Neighborhoods (units). Most sssisted livings offer day services, a 9 a.m.-5 p.m. program for residents with Alzheimer’s disease and dementia, to take part in all activities, meals, events, medications administration, etc. at the facility during that time frame. This service helps caregivers to still work, go to the grocery store, doctor’s appointments, etc. with peace of mind that their loved one is receiving the care they need.

Another service offered is a respite stay. Most places can offer a weekend to 90 days of respite, giving caregivers an opportunity to go to grandchildren’s graduation out of state, vacation with their children, or any other opportunities that arise. Having other caregivers exposed to the person suffering with memory loss, creates a new connection. They will be more engaging with someone new, and the “new” caregiver will bring new conversation and activities.

The caregiver support is not only beneficial to you but to your loved one as well.